Sometimes people get divorced hoping to escape the pain that is inside of them. You may be one of these people, or perhaps were married to one. The problem with this thinking is that the pain lives inside of you, so you take it with you wherever you go. It isn't somehow transferred from another person […]
In this week's video, we discuss why God allows us to suffer pain. It's a natural human tendency when we are in a lot of pain to wonder why God would allow it if He loves us and wants us to have joy. In our faith, we are taught the plan of happiness - that […]
As Valentine's Day has come once again, did you feel like you had a meaningful opportunity to celebrate a great relationship? Or did you think about one more year of singleness with a twinge of bitter longing? Did you perhaps, even let the holiday pass almost without notice and just try to avoid the whole […]
I met my eternal companion when I was 48 years old and married her when I was 50--as in five decades! Or a half century! How do you suppose I feel about that? At age 56, I am healthier, wealthier, wiser, and more spiritual than I was 30 years ago at age 26 when I married […]
We recently had a disagreement where one of us suggested having a deeper conversation about the topic to figure out how we could both have what we wanted. The other said, "How is that possible? How could we both have what we want?" Demanding the solution at the beginning of a discussion suggests that we […]
January 23rd was the sixth anniversary of our third first kiss. Less than four months later, we were sealed for time and all eternity in the Provo City Center Temple on 5/11/2018. You might be asking how a kiss could be a “first kiss” if it was “third.” If you’ve read our book, Intentional Courtship, you […]
"I am divorced because my former spouse 'went off the deep end,' 'had an affair,' or 'laid around in his underwear all day looking at porn instead of working.'" Or how about "I picked a better person this time, so things will be fine." How many times have we heard this kind of thinking in the mid-single […]
Since the audience for this letter is primarily Latter-day Saint single adults, it is almost inevitable that some of you did things you are not proud of that contributed to a divorce. Such misdeeds could include an affair (either sexual or emotional or both), serious dishonesty with a former spouse, substance abuse issues, or the […]
Every January, social media is full of posts where people announce their choice for a word as their theme for the year. For the past 7-8 years (since before we married), we've been choosing a word for ourselves. In 2023, Jeff chose "Strength" and Cathy chose "Comfort." We'd like to share a bit about our […]
