December 28, 2023
LILY Letter 142: Working with Reality & Making Compromises

Years ago, Jeff was working with a builder to construct a home. As they went through estimates of costs, the time it was going to take to complete, and what the finished product might look like, the builder told Jeff that, in construction, there are three priorities to consider: good, fast, cheap. He said, "Most […]

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January 31, 2023
LILY Letter 95: The Law of Unintended Consequences

The law of unintended consequences is a frequently observed phenomenon in which any action has results that are not part of the actor's purpose. The superfluous consequences may or may not be foreseeable or even immediately observable and they may be beneficial, harmful, or neutral in their impact. For example, our government printed $4 trillion […]

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October 3, 2022
FACING FINANCIAL DIFFICULTIES AS A MID-SINGLE

Money is a vexing subject for many mid-singles. You might be a single mom forced into the workforce for the first time by a divorce or the loss of your husband to death. You might be a single dad who has suffered business losses or career setbacks–whether they contributed to the misery that caused the […]

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June 20, 2022
ABOUT MID-SINGLE EXHAUSTION

My first divorce exhausted me in mind, body, and spirit. I felt like I had just been kicked in the stomach all the time for about 4 years. I felt so much anxiety about all of the life changes occasioned by divorce that I couldn't even open my mail at certain times. I would think, […]

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April 26, 2022
LILY Letter 55: Being Whole as a Single Person

Is there any part of you that is waiting to be rescued by a relationship? Many singles carry heavy burdens and it can be tempting to think the answer is to have a relationship with someone who will help with child responsibilities, household chores, and money. What's wrong with that? While it may be understandable […]

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April 8, 2022
MID-SINGLES AND MONEY

Money is a hard subject for many mid-singles. You might be a single mom forced into the workforce for the first time by a divorce or the loss of your husband to death. You might be a single dad who has suffered business losses or career setbacks--whether they contributed to the misery that caused the […]

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February 8, 2022
LILY Letter 44: Romance or Independence?

Valentine’s Day is nearly upon us and, for many, it brings more pressure and fear than joy. Pressure to meet the expectations of another can take the joy out of almost any celebration. Singles who don’t yet have a special person to celebrate with can feel this void more acutely as this holiday approaches. Many […]

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December 27, 2021
WHAT HOPE DO YOU HAVE?

The suicide rate in America increased by 24 percent from 2000-2014. The rate is so high now that it has actually decreased the average life expectancy by 3 years. It is the 7th leading cause of death for men and 14th for women. About 50,000 people, an entire small city, die by suicide every year […]

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December 2, 2021
FINANCIAL ISSUES AND SINGLE PARENTS

We all know single moms who have become displaced homemakers when a divorce occurred, and they were forced to enter the workforce for the first time in many years or perhaps the first time ever. Even if these women have college degrees, if they have gone a decade or two without putting anything new on […]

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