In this week's video, we discuss the use of the "D" word in marriage--the "D" word being "divorce." It is NOT good to include this word in marital vocabulary if what you really want is an atmosphere of safety, security and loving connection. It is important to make very clear commitments with yourself about not […]

As we celebrate independence here in America, we invite you to consider emotional independence and how to go about declaring that independence against whatever is depriving you of it. The inability to make a decision on your own can be its own form of tyranny. Fear that you lack the ability to support yourself financially […]

Jesus said His disciples would know the truth, and "the truth shall make you free" (John 8:32). Jesus said that the truth would liberate them from being servants of sin (John 8:34). Whether we are in bondage to our own sins or stuck in trauma resulting from the sins of others, the remedy is redemption […]

There are many important benefits to being bold and confident enough to be straightforward and say "I like you." In order to BE more than friends means doing something to allow for that option.  The reason it is bold to confess your feelings is the risk that your friend may not feel the same way. […]

The law of unintended consequences is a frequently observed phenomenon in which any action has results that are not part of the actor's purpose. The superfluous consequences may or may not be foreseeable or even immediately observable and they may be beneficial, harmful, or neutral in their impact. For example, our government printed $4 trillion […]

One thing we learn in meditation is how to separate ourselves from our thoughts and emotions. That includes being able to see our feelings like weather and watch them drift by like dark storm clouds. This is a helpful technique for mastering our emotions instead of being mastered by them. It also helps us release […]

Cathy and I often advise those who have been through a traumatic relationship loss to take some time to heal before venturing back out into the dating world. Sometimes, I think we might have overdone this. We recently attended weddings for two middle aged couples, both of whom had done a lot of intentional healing […]

We started ministering to mid-singles because they were underserved. Mid-singles are unique. Their needs are fundamentally different from those of most married and settled people. One of the biggest ways mid-singles are different comes down to trauma. Mid-singles and and even former mid-singles who have remarried have almost all experienced major losses, disappointments, and pain […]

The National Institute of Mental Health cited statistics showing the suicide rate among males was 3.7 times higher than among females. For centuries we have been socialized to believe that men are the stronger sex and exist to protect and provide for women. As Lea Winerman wrote: “Try to imagine the Marlboro man in therapy. […]