Little children offer pure love. They don't assume you are going to hurt them. In fact, if you do hurt them by scolding them, they will hold their arms up to you wanting to be held and reassured of your love. We see the way our little granddaughter (11 months) smiles at us and it […]
Is there any part of you that is waiting to be rescued by a relationship? Many singles carry heavy burdens and it can be tempting to think the answer is to have a relationship with someone who will help with child responsibilities, household chores, and money. What's wrong with that? While it may be understandable […]
For men, shame is most often manifest by feeling ashamed to be seen as weak. What was the most shameful thing you experienced in elementary school? Chances are that it involved being beaten up or bullied on the playground. I don't know if that is cultural or in our DNA. Whatever the reason, men have […]
I have sometimes wondered if Valentine's Day is worth it. For married people, it seems to be a time for crushed expectations and disappointment. Many complain that it adds pressure. For many singles, it is a poignant reminder of what they wish for and don't have. St. Valentine was a third century Roman Catholic. Since […]
Rejection is probably the biggest fear mid-singles have in dating. In many cases, we may think it means something about our worth or desirability. Thus, it's easy to take rejection personally and either lash out in response or turn inward and stuff unexpressed pain. Is this perspective really factual? For one thing, what other people […]
December 23, 2016, five years ago today, was one of those days when I said, like so many of you, "I hate dating!" It was the day Cathy broke up with me. I could tell it was coming for about a month. It had become increasingly obvious that her heart was not in our relationship […]
Have you ever stood over the crib and watched your young child sleeping and felt overwhelming love wash over you, only to be replaced by the gripping fear, "What if something happens to him/her?" And that thought steals your happiness and peace in a moment that might be one of unadulterated joy. Brene Brown used […]
I address this question to Latter-day Saint men in Chapter 6 of Intentional Courtship. The reasons are actually quite profound. Many Latter-day Saint mid-singles have lost temple marriages. Many are cynical and jaded and believe that temple marriage is for the optimistic young couple with their whole lives ahead of them. I have heard many […]
We seem to need heroes—larger than life figures who come to the rescue in moments of peril. George Washington was America's first big celebrity and every portrait artist in America wanted to paint him. George got tired of posing so Jean-Antoine Houdon used a plaster cast to make a life mask to loan to painters. […]
