June 27, 2023
LILY Letter 116: Developing a Positive Outlook on Dating & Relationships

We've heard so many single adults say "I hate dating." Why is that? Perhaps there are as many answers as there are people. But I think they all come down to something deep in our nature that dislikes being judged. And dating gives you more opportunities to be judged than almost anything else. When we […]

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November 2, 2021
WHY THE TEMPLE?

I address this question to Latter-day Saint men in Chapter 6 of Intentional Courtship. The reasons are actually quite profound. Many Latter-day Saint mid-singles have lost temple marriages. Many are cynical and jaded and believe that temple marriage is for the optimistic young couple with their whole lives ahead of them. I have heard many […]

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September 13, 2021
WHAT IF WE COULD JUST BE REAL?

One of the things I most commonly hear from mid-singles is, "I hate dating." Hey, I understand. Getting dressed nice and going out for a lovely meal at a restaurant with an attractive member of the opposite sex must be pure torture! All kidding aside, why don't people like dating? (1) They don't like the […]

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August 17, 2021
ABOUT BEAUTY

When Cathy and I were writing Intentional Courtship, one of our beta readers cautioned me about how much to use the word "beautiful," because love and marriage are not only for the beautiful people. Point taken. Having said this, I think the person you marry ought to be beautiful to you. What I want for […]

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August 3, 2021
LILY Letter 17: Wisdom from a Sex Therapist

Sex is a vital part of a thriving marriage. Most of us, including mid-singles, know or sense that. Most know that sexual intimacy is a sacred gift, and that is why we reserve it for our most sacred and special relationship in life. But often our way of teaching these principles can be profoundly negative. […]

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July 23, 2021
REFLECTION

We took this photo in Central Park. The beautiful reflection of the New York skyline kept shining through the trees and bushes on our walk. It was difficult to get a good view without hiking around and getting to just the right place to see it all clearly without obstruction. This is also true of […]

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June 12, 2021
A SIGN OF GRACE

I took this picture during a lunar eclipse on February 21, 2008 from the balcony of my home in Washington. 2008 was the last year my former wife and I were together. As I look back on the night that moon appeared, I am reminded of a couple of things. Even when our circumstances are […]

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