February 1, 2024
LILY Letter 147: Communicating Without Contention

We recently had a disagreement where one of us suggested having a deeper conversation about the topic to figure out how we could both have what we wanted. The other said, "How is that possible? How could we both have what we want?" Demanding the solution at the beginning of a discussion suggests that we […]

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January 11, 2024
LILY Letter 144: How to Talk to Dating Partners About Your Past

Since the audience for this letter is primarily Latter-day Saint single adults, it is almost inevitable that some of you did things you are not proud of that contributed to a divorce. Such misdeeds could include an affair (either sexual or emotional or both), serious dishonesty with a former spouse, substance abuse issues, or the […]

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May 2, 2023
LILY Letter 108: Having Hard Conversations

The kindest thing we can do in a relationship is to speak truth in a compassionate yet assertive way. However, most of us tend to avoid having hard conversations and the discomfort and unknown repercussions that can come with them. The following four scenarios are examples of why we tend to avoid hard conversations and […]

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April 25, 2023
LILY Letter 107: How Do You Handle Rejection?

From the first time in adolescence when we start expressing our interest in the opposite sex, we start down a road of dealing with romantic rejection -- sometimes for the rest of our lives! For many of us, it will be decades until we find a companion that we mutually choose for the long haul. […]

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April 25, 2022
HAPPY PODCASTING ANNIVERSARY

66 podcast episodes have been published on "LILY Pod" over the past year. Nearly 6,000 listens have come in since we started podcasting. To celebrate our year anniversary of "LILY Pod," we updated our cover with a professional photo of us and our brand new LILY Logo. If you haven't yet discovered what so many […]

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March 16, 2022
WHAT IF YOUR FORMER SPOUSE IS TOXIC?

You want a peaceful co-parenting relationship right? In some cases, I hear divorcees say "I can't have a peaceful relationship with my former because [he or she] is an abusive narcissist." And it's quite true. There are some people who are so bitter and self-involved that they can't play nicely with others, no matter how […]

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February 23, 2022
​LOUD VOICES

Life offers us plenty of "loud voices" that can deter us from our own divine guidance and potential. With intention and personal integrity, we can do what we feel inspired to do that is in our highest good and the greatest good of our planet despite loud voices that might otherwise distract us from our […]

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February 15, 2022
LILY Letter 45: Strong Men

The National Institute of Mental Health cited statistics showing the suicide rate among males was 3.7 times higher than among females. For centuries we have been socialized to believe that men are the stronger sex and exist to protect and provide for women. As Lea Winerman wrote: “Try to imagine the Marlboro man in therapy. […]

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February 12, 2022
WOMEN: CAN YOU TREAT MEN AS EQUALS IN LOVE?

Friends, I want to address you on something that has been weighing heavy on my heart for awhile now. I have been reluctant to bring this up, because I feel it personally. But the issue is bigger than my personal feelings. As Cathy and I have worked to write a book and create LILY, we […]

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