LILY Letter 181: Embracing Polarities & Balancing Opposing Virtues

November 14, 2024

In life, we often come across ideas that seem to contradict each other yet are both true and valuable. This concept invites us to see beyond simple categories of right and wrong. As Joseph Smith put it, "By proving contraries, truth is made manifest." Unlike the traditional "opposition in all things"—like good versus evil, polarities involve balancing two positive but opposing forces that, when held together in tension, maintain the virtues held therein. Think of justice paired with mercy, faith balanced by works, or the blend of unity with diversity. These are not opposites to conquer or eliminate but forces that must coexist to bring out the best in ourselves and in each other.

Understanding polarities offers more than just insight; it provides a powerful tool for personal growth and for nurturing healthy relationships. When we learn to balance two good things, we get to develop in our character the best of both virtues. For example, someone with a strong sense of self paired with empathy can maintain healthy boundaries while also connecting deeply with others. In relationships, this balancing act allows us to create spaces where both freedom and connection flourish. If we let one side dominate—such as empathy without self-care, or independence without compassion—we risk falling into unhealthy extremes like codependence or narcissism. By holding both sides of these truths, we can stay grounded and connected without compromising either part of ourselves. When opposing virtues are not in active tension, they tend to become unhealthy vices.

Living with this awareness transforms the way we approach personal challenges and the way we connect with others. Instead of feeling pressured to “pick a side,” we can honor the strengths in each polarity and allow them to complement one another. This mindset helps us appreciate the beauty of complexity in ourselves and those we love, making room for harmony, depth, and genuine attraction. As you explore the tension between these polarities, you’ll find that life becomes more balanced, relationships more fulfilling, and growth more dynamic. Embracing these contrasts truly invites us into a richer, more intentional life.

NEW VIDEO:

Proving Polarities: Tension Between 2 Good Things

In this video, we explore the concept of "proving polarities," where two positive yet opposing forces—like justice and mercy—work together to reveal deeper truths. By embracing the balance between these polarities, we foster personal growth, nurture healthier relationships, and live a more harmonious, intentional life. For more personal & relationship development resources, visit loveinlateryears.com.

To dive deeper into "Proving Contraries" watch:

Proving Contraries - Jared Halvorson  (3min)

Faith Matters: Proving Polarities & Paradox - A Conversation with Jared Halverson (68min)

 

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