LILY Letter 107: How Do You Handle Rejection?

April 25, 2023
From the first time in adolescence when we start expressing our interest in the opposite sex, we start down a road of dealing with romantic rejection -- sometimes for the rest of our lives! For many of us, it will be decades until we find a companion that we mutually choose for the long haul. That is why how we handle rejection is SO important and a topic worth diving into since we ALL deal with it. Rejection in dating can feel deeply personal. We often receive it as a judgment about our worth or worthiness as a potential spouse. If you have a history of rejection in a former relationship, it is especially tempting to simply assume there is something inherently inadequate about you. Yet, dating is kind of like trying on shoes. Some fit, while others don't. That doesn't mean there is anything wrong with perfectly good shoes - it's simply not the right fit for every foot. If we remember this parallel, we can be the wrong fit without making it mean we are not the right fit for everyone. We will be the perfect fit for the right person.
Along your dating journey, if you need to give bad news -- be clear and assertive while also being caring and compassionate. If you are receiving bad news, respond with class and be kind. Responding with "Christ-like poise" will allow you to maintain valuable associations that just may lead you to your eternal companion. How we handle rejection says a lot about who we are and ultimately, the quality of person we end up with. Dating after divorce or death of a spouse is unique because we develop relationships that already have many components of a marriage (work, children, etc.), but generally without long-term commitments (which is healthy when first getting to know someone). Over time, as we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and get attached, we risk painful rejection. Yet, the risk of rejection is the price of admission if we want to find lasting love. It can be difficult to keep having hope in a bright future when going through the pain of loss on your way to finding your forever companion. We can testify from our own experience that when you finally are blessed with what you want most, it is worth the price! If you feel discouraged, remember that we did too and that eventually, it will all work out if you keep going. Thanks for allowing us to support you along the way. Feel free to reach out if you want personal assistance through LILY Coaching. We are hear to support you!


Over the next 3 weeks we will be diving into "REJECTION" on LILY Pod to help you become a master at dealing with rejection. Stay tuned as we start with "Rejection is Along for the Single Ride," followed by "Giving Rejection Well" and "Receiving Rejection with Grace."

LILY Pod: Rejection is Along for the Single Ride

LILY Tube: Time Heals All Wounds - NOT!

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